Creepy Ex Listened To His Teenage Son Being Intimate...can't Be Legal Right?!

My 17 year old asked to go out of town with his partner and her family for a week. I got a call from my ex that he didn't want our son to be given a "Free pass for sex" so didn't want him to go. I said that was silly because they have been dating well over a year they have probably already had sex. His reply, "I know they have" I asked if our son told him that and he responded, "No I was listening in and heard the whole thing" ???? my ex admitted that he had installed Spyware on our son's phone and he could listen at anytime. I found it incredibly gross that he did that to my son and his girlfriend. She is 18, not sure if that matters legally that she is an adult.
I divorced my ex because he was abusive. He's been arrested for it a few years back. I realized that some of the things he has said to me seem odd like he knows very specific conversations I've had with my kids. I now know it's because he can listen in on their phones. This makes me feel very vulnerable and like I can't be comfortable in my own home.
So my question: is sending "spyware" to someone else's home legal? Is listening to your child have sex illegal or just creepy af?
Edit: I'm in the USA, Missouri
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