Confidential Name Change Post-divorce Due To Dv And Identity Theft

I am pretty desperate for some help and hoping to get some solid guidance regarding changing my name confidentially due to domestic violence and identity theft.

My former spouse and I dated for two years prior to marriage. There was never any violence or signs of temper. Things changed very quickly after we were married. I was married in 2019 for 7 months. During that year, 3 domestic violence calls occurred. One 911 call I made myself, and two were made by neighbors. The police were called every time and issued police reports. He was arrested all three times. I forced him to move out of the house, but due to the pandemic the court date kept getting pushed back due to covid and he kept harassing me, so I left quickly and moved across the country to a different state in 2021. I was able to file for divorce and all of that was completed via Zoom.

After the first out-of-state move, I thought I was being careful, but I had joined a gardening club in a leadership role and they posted my name and address online. I was not aware of this, until after he showed up at my new home. I did not go to the hospital that time, but he threatened self-harm, so I called the police and they put him on a psych hold. By the time he got out, I had packed up and left for a third state.

I was very careful this time - no social media, have a PO Box as a mailing address, rented an IPostal for mail and bills, never told anybody anything. All was going well for over two years and I finally thought I had gotten away from the situation. My rental property has a problem with mold, and after a mold remediation service came out, I paid a large sum of money to repair the property due to his promise to reimburse in alignment with the language in my lease. When I sent him a certified letter politely demanding reimbursement, he filed an eviction against me. The eviction was determined to be wrongful and was tossed out by the court, and the landlord ended up reimbursing me, but the paperwork he filed included both my iPostal mail address, residential address, email, and phone number. My personal information was online for about 45 days between September and October of 2023 before the court removed it after I filed a request for confidentiality due to DV and provided police reports. I have been living in AirBNBs ever since.

During that time, my former spouse had access to my new information, and since he had my social, was able to open lines of credit very quickly. I froze my credit shortly after I found out about the eviction, but he was able to open three cards and maxed them out. Today I found out that one of the credit card companies hired a debt collection lawyer in my state, and he filed a small claims suit against me. I contacted them and agreed to pay the amount off if they send me an offer letter stating that they will dismiss and file a confidentiality notice redacting my information. On top of that, I had to change my phone number and email again because of how many times he attempted to communicate with me. He stated in one of the emails that he found me because of the wrongful eviction suit that was tossed out. He also emailed me from his current girlfriend's email address, or got her to do it. I don't think he ever had any intention to stop looking for me no matter who comes into his life in future.

I had discussed back in 2019 with my therapist and also an ADA in the state where I was married about the idea that at some point, I may need to change my name. I really didn't want to do that. I was proud of my name and my family, and wanted to try to keep it if I could. I have no children or dependents, my parents are both deceased, and no siblings. Because of what is happening now, I think the time has come to change my name. I cannot keep living like this. I understand what you have to do to get a new ID and new social security number. I have reviewed different states' processes for confidential name change but what I really want to know is where I can do this the fastest. In what state is it easiest/fastest to complete a confidential legal name change if you have copies of DV police reports and identity theft documentation? Would it be better to work with an attorney for this, or would that slow down the process? If an attorney would be best, what kind of attorney specialization...family law? DV? I have funds to pay a retainer and understand how all of that works. I want to go wherever I can get this done quickly and confidentially. I live in the Southeast but am staying in an AirBNB since this happened, I work remotely, for myself, and can travel or temporarily locate as needed. I am currently in a state that does not have "mechanism for sealing name change even if risk exists" as described here: https://safeescape.org/a-whole-new-you-name-changes-and-identity-updates-for-survivors-of-domestic-violence/. I know I will need to relocate to one of the states that do have these programs, but I am hoping to learn more about which state is easiest/fastest considering I have documentation of the DV and identity theft.

Thank you for reading. If you have any guidance to provide, I would appreciate it.

Edited to include: TRO's are long expired during the pandemic when court kept getting delayed, and I do not know where he lives or what jurisdiction for any potential court matters pertaining to him.

**Full disclosure for mods, this is a new reddit account that I created for asking this question.